Basil Method 5: Special (to an Extent)

Agreeing with JJ, class severely sucks. Anyone would do anything to get out of it, but let’s look at this realistically: where do you find the materials to make cutting your own leg off look like an accident? Oh, and you probably don’t want to cut your leg off either. Like my other methods, this will maintain the concept, but just a bit less casualties…and the sustained use of your legs.

1) It seems that my first steps are usually, similar to JJ’s, but I don’t really want to cut off my leg... My first step is to find a friend who has a doctor as a parent…or a doctor you know that’s a good friend or is just amazing in general.

2) Fake a severe leg injury. That’s right, FAKE it. This way, your leg is perfectly fine, yet you get to ride around in a wheelchair as people take pity on you. Have the awesome doctor help you in your plan and fake an x-ray and tell your parents that you are in need of serious surgery and will not be able to walk for quite some time. Schedule your “surgery” for a really long time from the doctor’s appointment, giving you long enough to fake your demented leg.

3) Finally I get to agree with JJ on something. STAY IN AVERAGE CLASSES. The class time you will miss will seriously affect your honors grades, so stick to the easy classes with the popular peeps in em :)

4) You flaunting your injured leg and wheelchair/crutches means you need some help from one-or four- people to get around. Make sure they’re the popular kids, since you want popularity and they want the benefits of leaving class early and getting to class late.

5) Like JJ, look helpless as much as possible. The less enemies, the better. Oh, and at this point, you should have an elevator key for your school since you can't go up and down stairs. Don’t forget that.

6) Now you’ve got the popular kids hanging around with you to miss classes, and they’re warming up to the real you…but oh, no! It’s “surgery” time! Go to the doctor and have that fake cast/brace/whatever removed, so you’re “fully healed” when you return to school.

7) You’re at school but now you have a problem. The popular kids who didn’t know you well enough don’t have any benefits to hanging out with you anymore since you don’t have the wheelchair, right? WRONG. You happen to still have an elevator key that you “forgot” to return to the school administration. The popular kids will still want to ride the elevator (since it’s a pretty cool thing to do), so they’ll continue to hang with you, so long as you have the elevator key.

8) If the administrators find out you never gave back the key and take it away, it should be no problem by now. The popular kids all like you for you, since they’ve gotten a chance to get to know you, so you’re officially popular! If they don’t, well that cool doctor is probably able to help you out when you get “hit by a bus” next week ;)